You didn’t think it would be this easy to feel this bad at a four star resort in the Carribean. But it is. Every happy couple, every laughing family, every overweight tourist by the pool is a reminder of how horribly wrong things have gone. You’re drunk all the time and have started pretending you don’t speak english so you can argue with the hustlers on the beach about the price of palm leaf hats in a mixture of terrible spanish and rude hand gestures. Still, all is not lost, you are getting a lot of reading done.